Texas Our Texas

It has been nearly two years now since we moved back to Texas. We signed our lease in April of 2012, but didn't actually move in and take up residence until the first of June. In any case we had been planning our relocation for several years. The question that sometimes occurs to me is: why? Well, there was my Mom, who certainly wanted us to "come home." And we have many friends and other family who still live here whom we've been able to see more often, theoretically at least, some of them. But it remains hard to explain the attractions. The climate, for example, while it suits me fine, is by any objective standard pretty awful. The winters can be mild, but also wet and miserable at times, and the summers are unrelenting heat, often accompanied by humidity. Sensible people go elsewhere during the month of August, almost anywhere other than Death Valley is a welcome change. And now, with this ten years drought, we're running short of water, so maybe Death Valley might be just as accommodating.

Then there's Texas politics, something I have never really understood. Of course, only about five or ten percent of the eligible voters participate. So you get a minority of folks who are generally madder than hell about something voting for candidates who could not possibly be as ignorant as they pretend to be. But it has always been that way. When I was a kid growing up in San Antonio everyone was supposedly a Democrat. Now most of them say they are Republicans. But I have no idea what that means, nor I suspect do they. Basically, Texans want to be left alone and hate to pay taxes, but they expect the State (and the Federal Government) to supply all manner of services, most especially roads with very high speed limits and no tolls. Most Texans like to believe that they aren't really part of the rest United States, or if they are it's only provisionally, meaning they can secede at any time they wish. They will actually tell you that was part of the agreement when Texas became a state.

Some people speak of American exceptionalism, but that is nothing compared to Texan exceptionalism. Not only do Texans take exception to most things, they believe there is something truly special about being a Texan. And I suspect there is something special, but I'm not sure it's worth bragging about. Nevertheless, if you ever meet a Texan, and you'll know it in a matter of minutes if you do, because it's either the first or the second thing Texans will tell any stranger they happen to encounter, you'll see what I mean. Texans are always proud of being Texans. As I said, don't ask me why. It's just something we are proud of. Some will say everything is bigger in Texas (it isn't); some will say everything is better in Texas (definitely not). Some folks have unkindly suggested that the reason Texans are so quick to brag about Texas is because of an inferiority complex. That's a good theory, but as a native fifth generation Texan, I can tell you it's not true. Texans really believe Texas is bigger and better than anywhere else. Delusional they may be, but I have yet to encounter a Texan with an inferiority complex.

So why am I back here after escaping for forty years? Well, as I said, it's hard to explain. The only thing I can come up with is despite all the obvious drawbacks, I really do like it here. It's home. I like the hot weather; much prefer it to the cold. I especially like the brushy desert of the hill country, the live oak and cedar and agarita and yucca and agave growing wild, with bursts of wild flowers every spring. I also used to love the central Texas lakes before they dried up in the drought, but maybe one day they will return. As I said, I'm a fifth generation Texan, with Alsatian and German Texan ancestors going back to about 1850. And I'm married to a Texas woman with similar native roots. We like it here because it's home. It's where we're from. It seems familiar, both the good and the bad.

What I don't understand, though, is why anyone else would want to come here. I really don't. They say that Texas has some of the fastest growing urban areas in the country. Hundreds of people are moving here every day. Are they nuts? Don't they see what they're getting into? Do they really think they can live in this heat? My advice: before you move visit in July or August. There is not a month here when temperatures don't reach into the 90s at least some of the time. And have they read the Texas newspapers? Do they see who's in charge? Are there really just no jobs anywhere else? And don't they realize we're running out of water? Plus, the roads are inadequate, and there is no public transportation, yet everyone drives a car and most have more than one, and they're all armed. But if you don't drive, you're likely road kill: check the statistics on pedestrians and bicycle riders who get run down around here. My advice is look elsewhere. I'm stupid. I'm a native Texan. I have to live here. But everyone else really does have a choice. I would suggest looking somewhere else, somewhere not so exceptional.